I was here- I. AM. Here.

It’s not too small. It’s not insignificant. My voice is just that- MY VOICE.

Photo: Amanda Donaho

Hey there, friends. I’ve been holding back on you a bit. You see, I can’t even count the amount of posts, articles, infographics, etc I’ve composed in my head and never shared. I just figured, who am I? I’m NO expert. It’s not a lack of caring. I just don’t want to waste your time.

Your words, your work, your online life is one of the things your kids will look back to when you’re gone to say, ‘ this is what my mom was about.’

So let me lay it all out there.

I’m too scared to try.

I’ll get to telling you all about me, my point of view, my passions, my faith; but first I need to tell you a story.

I just spent the weekend at a retreat for creatives; photographers, designers, planners, videographers. I am none of these. I was hanging out in the kitchen. Cooking, doing dishes, and watching some really inspiring entrepreneurs hone in on the heart of their business. One of my oldest, dearest friends was hosting this group and maybe it was my FOMO (or her intuition) but I pretty much inserted myself in this weekend. “How about I come and serve as your private chef?”

So while I didn’t sit in on the sessions on building your brand, finding your point of view, connecting with clients, I did have some really incredible conversations. These women have so much grit. Almost all have overcome personal hardships, tragedies, so much struggle, and yet still have built vibrant, successful businesses. And even more, they’re creatively fulfilled, leaving their marks on the world. USING THEIR GIFTS.

And then the questions…
“What’s your story?” “Do you cook for a living?” “Has food always been your passion?”And the scariest one, “What’s your social media handle?” (I can see you rolling your eyes right now. Also, I’m 38). My social media presence consists of a moderately active Instagram account, which is mostly pics of my kids and puppy and a Facebook account which exists only to keep up with friends and family. I occasionally post a food photo or maybe a PR at the gym, but I’m not lifestyle social media sharer. I just want Aunt Kathy to be able to see how cute my guys were at summer camp.

But, why?
You see, I LOVE to learn about food, nutrition, fitness, supplements, high performing gear! And if you know me, you know I will evangelized you to the max! When I get behind something like that it’s all I can talk about. Seriously, ask my friends and family. But, that evangelism has never translated to the online world. Here’s why: I’m no expert. I don’t have any letters behind my name to validate my research. Most of this stuff wasn’t even on my radar during my college years. So when I think about putting it out there for anyone beyond my circle of quiet (more on this later) it’s always been a hard pass.

Enter Terri

Are you familiar with an alcoholic beverage called Hot Damn? It’s this kind of crazy liquor that burns your face off with cinnamon and spice and finishes sweet. This is Terri. She is strong and feisty with the biggest, sweetest heart! She pulled me aside one night during the retreat and share her story; complete with near death experiences due to a very acute heart issue that popped up during a pregnancy. She asked me that scary question about social media. I gave her all of my reasons (read: excuses) and she blew up every one with this one statement: “You don’t blog for others! Who cares if you have 5 followers or 5 million? Your words, your work, your online life is one of the things your kids will look back to when you’re gone to say, ‘ this is what my mom was about.'”

Terri and I are the same age and she’s had experiences that demanded she look at the things she’s leaving as a legacy for her family. And it’s true. Why can’t I share my thoughts, the things that make me the person I am at this place in my life? I want my now 8 year old to read this when he’s 28 and say, “Yep. That’s my mom.”

So maybe my thoughts about mind-body-spirit will resonate with you. And maybe they wont. But, Levi and Abe, however you’re reading this when I’m old or gone, this is your mom. I’m 38 years old. I just decided that I’d share some of my crazy wellness rantings with you and the world. And maybe you can even show your kids and grand kids why I made you eat that hard, sprouted bread or green food smoothies. xoxo.

I was here. I AM here.

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